What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

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Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the world. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

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I've never seen your mother, so I won't make any vile suggestions concerning her weight.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

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What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Hey

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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