What's big and messy? A big mess

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

hello

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's newborn baby? Neither has she.

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

Where would canada be without nature? still here

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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