Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Why did the black guy seem so black next to a white guy? Because he had more melanin in his skin

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

Small Penis.

whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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