Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Potassium? K.

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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