Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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what's purple and plastic purple plastic

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A black man walks out of a police station

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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