Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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One time i was sitting down

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As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

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Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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Im cute hehehee

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops