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So a bar walks into a man...

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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Knock Knock No solicitors

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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What is the name of Helin Keller's street, state and pet Street: Mahhehb State: Hahgre Pet: habdsa

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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Indians

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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