why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Who has, there are like... Well actually I might have watched them all, downloaded them in a torrent... A LEGAL torrent of course... NOT. Well, you get a hint, it looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, and its a trick question since Mickey Mouse was not actually drawn by Disney, so yeah.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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