The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

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What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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kennah campion when she talks

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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A Hispanic was walking down the street, he turned left and was at his house.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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