a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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knock knock? come in

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HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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