Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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