David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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