Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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deez nuts

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops