What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops