Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down -13

so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops