There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down -30

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops