On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

A man is a joke for making a joke on antijoke

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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