Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

A Hispanic was walking down the street, he turned left and was at his house.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

I have an idea! You leave.

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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