A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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the economy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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