Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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Tony Romo

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Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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what's worse than pie? alot of things.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops