a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops