Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

Paper or plastic? Yes...

Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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