Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

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Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

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How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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