What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

Robin, get in the car!

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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