i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Donald Trump

An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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