Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops