What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

kieran is a homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops