Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

hey guys im gay

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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