Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana Your parents must have little regard for your social identity because they named you after a tropical fruit. Either that or you are clinically insane. I am concerned; please leave.

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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A black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a priest are on plane that is on fire. What do they do? Call their family and tell them they lovedthem, because there are more than likely going to die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

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What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

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lewis=cardiac

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops