Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

Get on the boat.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

your so fat. your fat!

hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

David Cameron

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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