Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

No

Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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