What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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