A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

how man

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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