Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why was osama bin laden shot and killed? because he was a very violent man and deserved his punishment

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

You are joking right?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This is just like Facebook. If you guys want to like comments, or even comment on them, just get Facebook.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops