Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

Ring Ring Hello? Click

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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