What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

Should a pole bump an alarm?

Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

Atheism

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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