How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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your mom.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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