Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

A baby seal walks into a club.

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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