Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

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Corn Muffins

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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