Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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