a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Corn Muffins

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

thumb_up thumb_down +8

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops