How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

Bob Saget

What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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