What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

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A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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there's a bus full of black people what do you call the white bus driver? coach.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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