What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

Chris Bosh's neck

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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