What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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Stevan Hawkings walked into a bar. Ohh shit :/

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says "Well, it's a long story but I tell you. You see, one day I was walking along the beach and I found a dusty old lamp. I rubbed the lamp and a big magic genie appeared. He told me I could have 3 wishes." The horse continues: "So I told the genie I wish I had a 10 billion dollars. I checked my bank account and sure enough it came true. My second wish was I wished for a beautiful wife. Suddenly a light came from the sky like an angel falling and I saw a beautiful woman and fell in love with her." The bartender says to the horse "Let me guess, so for your third wish, did you wish you were a horse with a long face?" The horse says "No that's not what I wished for." The bartender asks "What was your third wish?" The horse says "Well you won't believe me but I wished I was a bartender pretending to talk to a horse about some genie granting him wishes." After about 30 minutes of arguing with himself, other employees at the bar had had enough of the bartender talking to himself and called psychiatric personnel to escort the bartender to the mental hospital as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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