Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

Whats two plus two Four!

What's the differnce of victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and others were raped then killed. Kelvin Yang.

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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