A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

WILLYS

thumb_up thumb_down +13

When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +13

haha

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you call a black chef glendon

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops