What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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