How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

Where's the soap?

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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