What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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