Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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What stops a train? A missile

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Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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