So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

your face

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

My name is me I like fired chicken!

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh hey Banana what's up? Nothing much. You? Oh nothing, I was just talking to Apple here. Oh hey Apple. Hey.

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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