A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh hey Banana what's up? Nothing much. You? Oh nothing, I was just talking to Apple here. Oh hey Apple. Hey.

A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

My name is me I like fired chicken!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

Nobody cares maddie!

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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