There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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rent a cops

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What do you call Rosa Parks? One bitchy negro. Just kidding she was a visionary for human rights, now you can't dislike this cause you'll be saying that Rosa Parks wasn't a visionary, take that blacks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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